Children’s Behavior Problems - Rewards and Punishments: What’s the Right Way to Use Them?
The fundamental rule for all discipline problems is encouraging good behavior instead of punishing bad behavior. It’s a tried and tested method that rewards work better than punishments.
Sure, it might work for you for a little while, but then you find your children laughing at you every time you say ‘one more time and I’ll (insert child disciplinary method)’. Well, you aren’t the first parent to experience this and not only does it ruin consistency, it creates a negative environment in the home.
You can’t afford to neglect child discipline; but punishment tactics should be avoided as far as possible; they don’t work. Try a reward system instead. Rewards don’t have to be tangible; a nod of approval, a word of praise and a warm hug can work wonders. You can encourage positive children’s behavior by positive reinforcement. It makes you and your child feel good. And, it saves time on the yelling.
Don’t know where to start with establishing a reward system? Here are some parenting help steps to help you get started.
1. Sit down, just the parents, and communicate. Set up a list of child behavior actions and rewards. For example, cleaning up the bedroom without having to be reminded means an extra hour of TV on the weekend.
2. The next step is to sit down with your children, if they are old enough, and explain the system. Remember to engage older children in this type of routine change. It will make it run smoothly and avoid any child behavior problems. If they feel they are contributing to the household decision making process they will be more willing to cooperate. Younger children listen to older siblings more than they obey orders from parents. They are the second-rung management, you see.
3. Follow through and keep a record. Keeping track of a lot of activities can be hard to do. Use the chart to keep track of where each child stands. This is also a visual reinforcement.
Following these three steps will help you get started in establishing a reward-based child discipline system in your home to help make sure things get done. By rewarding good child behavior and the accomplishment of child discipline tasks, you set a positive foundation for self-esteem.
More information on children’s behavioral problems is available from Dr. Noel Swanson’s website, which is all about solving Child Behavior Problems. Make sure you get Dr. Swanson’s FREE newsletter and 1 hour downloadable audio CD too.
April 22nd, 2009 at 10:41 am
well written article. Every child is an individual. So you cannot compare a child’s behavior to another child. They really have a different personality. You cannot push your child to do the things that other children do. Make an activity that would make your child busy and at the same time he or she can learn from that activity. Communication is very important. Interesting blog. Thank you for sharing.
April 26th, 2009 at 8:03 am
Disciplining a child needs a lot of patience. Turning the negative behavior to good is very hard. Even child has a mood swing too. So giving rewards instead of punishment more likable. Children loves to receive rewards. Great post.